Wednesday, May 20, 2015

My Story- How I became a Beachbody Coach

You wake up after having slept a little, grab a breakfast you’re not really excited to eat on your way to a job you’re not really excited about. You spend your afternoon dreading going to the gym to work out after work, but try to pump yourself up because you know you need to go.  On top of it all, you’re frustrated that you’re not losing weight.  You are in a constant state of exhaustion and borderline depression.  Sound familiar?

In 2014 that is where I found myself. I was not overweight according the charts, but didn’t feel good about the way my clothes felt and looked on me so I decided that I wanted to change. I started spending more time in the gym; 20-30 min of weight training followed by another hour on the stationary bike, treadmill or elliptical.  I ran several miles on the weekends and got up early on Sundays to work out before church.  I trained boot camp style, tried HIIT training, heavy weights low reps, light weights high reps. I was doing every type of workout that people tell you to do when you want to lose weight, but I was staying the same size.  I would tell myself it was hormones or genetics and I just needed to work harder.

Meanwhile, my body was hurting, especially my back, my burn-out level was out the roof and I’d often feel so frustrated when trying to find something to wear that I would just sit in front of my closet and sob.  Shopping for clothes was a nightmare. I’ve always been smaller on the top than on the bottom so finding pants that fit in the waist AND the rear end was nearly impossible, not to mention time consuming.  So in 2014 I did the unexpected, I quit going to the gym. 

Quitting the gym was not necessarily what I WANTED to do.  My back problems had gotten so bad that I struggled to get out of bed in the mornings.  After an emergency visit to the chiropractor I was diagnosed with a bulging disc in my lower back. This meant no more high impact moves or heavy weights.  No more long workouts and running was completely off the table for at least a year.  I panicked!  What was I going to do?!  Working out was my stress reliever, my “me” time and I feared I would put on a ton of weight.  Luckily, I had just signed up to become a Beachbody coach and chose a program called PiYo.  It was touted as low impact yet body defining workout that paired yoga and Pilates. I was skeptical to say the least.  How were slow movements and stretching going to help me stay in shape? Plus, I’m about as flexible as a 2x4 wall stud so I questioned whether or not I’d even be able to do most of the moves.  After a month of PiYo (which in some ways was harder than any workout I’d ever done) I began to SEE AB MUSCLES and gained flexibility I’d never had before. The PiYo program also came with a nutrition guide and I gave it a shot.  Turns out my nutrition was way out of whack! I thought I’d been fueling my body correctly in the past, but my diet had been sabotaging my efforts.  Once I got rolling on track with proper nutrition my body started to change-slowly.

I was being treated twice a week for my bulging disc and as I healed I became stronger in my back and left side (the side of the bulge).  Instead of dreading my workout I looked forward to PiYo every morning.  The workouts were short (45 min. max) so I felt like I gained time in my schedule, unlike before when I was spending hours driving to the gym, working out and driving home.  My husband could notice a change in my demeanor, I had my excitement back!  I felt challenged, but not completely drained.  I felt recharged , refocused and motivated. 

When my nutrition and workouts were off balance I had a negative outlook on life.  I was in a routine of defeat that I wasn’t even aware that I was in and I wasn’t spending time with people which caused me to become reclusive.   Quitting the gym forced me out of my routine and gave me a fresh perspective and a new way to workout, which I love!  And being a Beachbody coach gave me a great opportunity to talk to people everywhere I go.  I am not advocating that everyone quit going to the gym, I am a member of a great gym and I even teach a class there once a week, but since being introduced to at-home workout programs that stress nutrition as much as exercise, I am much happier.

If you need help, feel burnt out, frustrated with your current exercise and nutrition or just want to try something new, I’d love to chat with you.  I am NOT a sales person for Beachbody, I am a COACH for Beachbody.  NFL coach Tom Landry says it best.  “A coach is someone who tells you what you don't want to hear, who has you see what you don't want to see, so you can be who you have always known you could be.” You are capable of more than you can imagine when you have the support and encouragement of a group of people.  My goal is to cultivate such an environment in my challenge groups.  You don’t have to stay stuck where you are, you can change, we can do it together!

Monday, March 30, 2015

 Droughts, Doubts ad Down Spouts

“For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God.” Colossians 3:3

It started at a church service.  That’s not typically where you’d think a downward spiral would start, but that’s what happened.  Let me explain.  My husband and I were visiting a friend’s church and while there I ran into a woman that I hadn't seen since I was a child.  During the course of our conversation and while catching up on the years, we discovered we were both passionate about women’s ministry.  In fact, she was thinking of starting a woman’s conference in a nearby town.
I have spoken a few times to groups of women and love to do so every chance I get. So, we exchanged information and soon began talking and meeting to plan for the conference.  One morning in early October, during my morning quiet time with the Lord, He laid on my heart the topic He wanted me to speak about at the women’s conference: being imprisoned by “The Law”.  If you have no idea to what I am referring when I say “The Law”, I am talking about trying to earn God’s grace and favor by our actions. The scripture I felt God wanted me to use was Isaiah 61:1-4 (Isaiah 61:1-4).  Tears streamed down my face as I read the words of those 4 verses. They say that I was a prisoner and that Christ came to SET ME FREE. He came to bestow on ME a crown of beauty instead of ashes. 

I was excited and pumped to start chewing on that scripture and tearing into it to learn and prepare a message for the women attending the conference.  After my quiet time was over I went downstairs and shared with my husband what God had spoken to me and we began praying more fervently for the women that would hear the words God was preparing for them.  That is when the switch got flipped…

For most of my life I have been prisoner. I thought I had to perform to earn God’s approval.  I went to church regularly, read my bible, prayed, got involved in ministry leadership and surrounded myself with other Christians. Instead of doing these things OUT of love; I was doing them to GET love. 
 Through much prayer, fasting, scripture, great books and some counseling, I now have a much better understanding of my identity in Christ and how His grace covers me. I am a “recovering Pharisee” - a term my pastor uses for those who come from a life of hard core legalism.  Sometimes, right when I think I understand grace, legalism whips out the chains and puts me in a prison of my own making.   I have to remind myself almost daily that I do not have to perform for God to love me.  It is a subconscious battle though; legalism is so ingrained in me that I don’t even have to THINK to act legalistically.  For instance, I usually get on my knees to pray because it is a posture of humility and surrender of which God deserves, but there was a time when I thought God would honor my prayers more and hear me better if I were on my knees.  It took me a long time to be able to pray face up and eyes open.

Back to my downward spiral.   Once my husband and I began praying more and more for the women’s conference, something in my spiritual life changed.  First Peter 5:8 says “Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion seeking someone to devour.”Thoughts that I hadn't entertained for so long came creeping back into my mind.  Thoughts like: “God doesn't really care about you”; “You are just a face in a crowd of much better Christians”; and the one he uses most often, “if you’d be a better Christian God would love you more”.  Now before you go thinking that I’m saying “the devil made me do it”, let me say that I am aware that it is my choice to believe these lies. At first I recognized them as lies and tried to shake it off, but then some other things in my life began to unravel.  Everything seemed to line up with the lies. Why was God letting these things happen if He REALLY cared?  Why doesn't He DO SOMETHING?

I wish I could tell you that I was a super Christian and in no time I was back in the game “fighting the good fight”, but that’s not remotely close to the truth.  After the morning God revealed Isaiah 61:1-4 as the verses He wanted me to speak from, I struggled for almost 5 months with each day feeling further and further from God.  I tried everything during that time to make God feel real again. I prayed more and cried out to God. When that didn't work I gave God the silent treatment (as if I thought THAT was going to make things better). Then I all but stopped reading my Bible.  My soul felt empty and bone dry.  It felt like God was giving ME the silent treatment.  Nothing spoke to me; nothing in the Bible, not even my favorite podcast preachers.  I was ready to throw in the towel. So I did.  I quit.  I quit trying to please God. 

In an act of utter despair I crawled into a ball on the floor one morning and said, “God I’m giving up.  I can’t live my life without Your presence.  Please restore my soul. I need to know you care for me.”  That was all I prayed.  Still I felt nothing. 
A few days later I attended a service at the church that agreed to host the women’s conference.  I wasn’t expecting anything except to hear a sermon, meet some people and go home, but God had brought me there to restore my soul.  The sermon I heard (from Revelation of all places) was about the Bride of Christ.  We, the Church, are His bride and He is coming back for us.  The pastor went into detail about how a groom loves his bride and how God’s love for HIS Bride was so much more.  He also talked about how God made us pure.  Revelation 19:7 says:
“Let us rejoice and exult
    and give him the glory,
for the marriage of the Lamb has come,
    and his Bride has made herself ready;
it was granted her to clothe herself
    with fine linen, bright and pure”—

My sin makes me feel so ugly and unworthy, but God does not see me all covered in my yucky sin.  He see me as bright and pure, as on the day of the marriage of the Lamb.  On that day I will truly be sinless; but here on earth I am “hidden in the righteousness of Christ” (Colossians 3:3).  I love that word picture, don’t you? 

When I played hide and go seek as a child I would find the best hiding spots!  They were the spots in which none of me could be seen.  It’s the same when we accept Christ as our savior. God no longer sees our imperfections; He instead sees the righteousness of His own Son (Ephesians 2:13;Hebrews 8:12). Because we are in Christ, God sees Christ’s righteousness covering us.

Once I let those truths soak into my soul it was like God turned on the downspout of His presence, love and acceptance.  I felt free!  Trying to earn God’s love created a barrier between God and me, but that afternoon it came crumbling to the ground.

I know I don’t have legalism whipped.  In fact, it will probably always be a something I struggle to overcome, a thorn in the flesh so-to-speak, which keeps me running to God.  I’m thankful for this last battle for it has taught me to run to Him sooner instead of drowning in my performance- based -grace mindset.

Monday, December 15, 2014

This is an excerpt from Beth Moore’s book “Breaking Free”.  The picture she paints is so beautiful that trying to put it into my own words would take away from the beautiful imagery. 

Psalm 127:3-4 says that “sons are a heritage form the Lord, like arrows in the hands of a warrior.”  We know from John 3:16 that Jesus is God’s only begotten Son.  John 3:17 tells us God gave His Son for the salvation of people by sending Him into the world. 
You see, God only had one arrow in His quiver.  The most perfect arrow ever to exist, a masterpiece, priceless to Him.  Cherished for above all the host of heaven.  Nothing could compare.  His only heritage.  His only Son.  But as God looked on a lost world- desperate and needy and in the clutches of the enemy-His heart was overwhelmed.  Though they had sinned miserably against Him and few sought Him, God had created them in love and could not love them less.
Love reached sacrificially into the quiver and pulled for the solitary arrow.  The quiver would now be empty, His cherished arrow in the hands of hateful men.  Yes, God so loved the world; but God also loved His only begotten Son with in expressible, divine affection.  The divine dilemma: two loves.  And one would demand the sacrifice of the other.  He positioned the weapon, pulled back the bow, steadied His grip, aimed straight for the heart: “And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes and laid him in a manger (Luke 2:7).

I think this passage is so appropriate as we celebrate this season of Christ’s birth.  It’s great to remember the events of Christ’s birth; to marvel at the fact that he was born of a virgin, laid a manger because his parents were not wealthy, and a God sized star shone above the place of his birth.  But let us not forget why God sent His only begotten son.  “The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth” (John 1:14)….”He himself is the sacrifice that atones for our sins--and not only our sins but the sins of all the world ”(1 John 2:2).  Jesus was born to die, for OUR sins.  He lived a perfect life.  Hard to imagine right?  I can’t stop sinning, he never started!  I deserve death for my sins, but He sacrificed His life so I wouldn't have to suffer for eternity.  In the words of Beth Moore “Oh what unfathomable love.  What a sacrifice.  All who will lower their shields of unbelief and let the arrow penetrate shall be saved.”

I don’t know if you’re feeling what I’m feeling right now, but I've had to stop, picture, meditate and respond to God.

Saturday, November 8, 2014


What is Healthy?
What comes to mind when you think about someone being healthy?  Do you automatically imagine a person with a good body, someone who doesn't have any medical problems?  The dictionary says healthy is “having good health; not sick or injured”.  From that definition, we are still left wondering, what is “good health”/healthy?  Is healthy merely a physical condition?  I believe that healthy has four facets- physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual.  They all work in combination to produce “good health”.  You can be in good emotional shape, but in terrible physical health and vise versa.  Furthermore, to be in good overall health all facets need to be cared for.  You cannot grossly neglect one facet to care for the others which creates imbalance and throws off the whole picture of health. Despite this belief, this is where I found myself for so many years.

 My Struggle
 Most of my adult life I have cared for my physical health but neglected the spiritual, mental, and emotional.  Or I would be on track with the physical and spiritual but I was a wreck in the other two facets.  I was trapped in a cycle of always taking care of the physical and one more facet, but never all four.  Why?  Well, I didn’t know it at the time but I had made my body an idol.  I worked out every day and rarely took a rest day.  My workouts and nutrition were top priority over everything else-friends, family, and God.  In my mind, I was “taking care of myself”.  But my obsession with having a great body dictated my schedule and where I would and would not go eat with friends; it made me judgmental at family meals and worst of all it took over the throne of my heart where only God was supposed to sit.  The way I looked dictated my mood, my self-esteem, and my self-worth.  From the outside I was “the picture of health”, I was also involved in my church and dating the man of my dreams, but in my heart and mind I was slowly decaying.

The Revelation
On a Sunday in January 2013 my pastor preached a sermon on idols.  I have never in my life felt so uncomfortable!  I knew when the pastor started describing the signs and symptoms of an idolatrous heart that my sin was being shown to me by God and it was ugly!  I wanted to run out of the sanctuary with my fingers in my ears!  I knew that if I was aware of my sin then God would want me to change- in other words I was CONVICTED!  If you’ve ever been under conviction from the Holy Spirit it ain’t pretty folks!  But He convicts us out of love.  To quote Isaiah 48:17  “This is what the Lord says- your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs  you in the ways you should go”.  Sin, of any kind, is harmful and all sins are equal in the eyes of God, but idolatry is especially dangerous to a Christ follower because our idols become what control us. I was being controlled by my body image. Since I am adult I sat quietly in my seat and listened to the rest of the sermon instead of running out like a big baby.  From that point on I was keenly aware of the changes I needed to make.
Although, I was aware that my body image was my idol, I didn’t do anything about it for almost a year.  I was too scared to let go in fear that God would make me stop working out altogether.  I was too scared to give God control of my time and my mind. I had built a reputation of being “fit” and “a machine” in the gym.  I didn’t want anyone to think I was a quitter.

In October 2013 I became engaged, from that point the battle was on to look good in my dress, but I had fallen into a comfortable eating pattern with my fiancĂ©.  I was no longer only eating “health nut” foods, I was eating normal meals and enjoying dinner dates and surprise desserts with the man of my dreams.  The weight just wouldn’t come off!  Plus, I was having some medical problems and was unable to work out as hard as could in the past.  Mentally and emotionally I was unable to cope since I had tied all of my self-worth and self-esteem to my body.  Spiritually, I felt far from God, I still had a regular quiet time but often instead of scripture my mind would focus on my next workout or guilt over what I ate the night before.  I was a ticking time bomb!  6 months later after being married only 3 months I exploded!  I can’t even remember what triggered it but I sobbed and confessed my sin to my husband.  I felt so ashamed but also relieved to confess and share my burden.  He showered me with grace and love.  He also promised to help me and hold me accountable for my thoughts and actions.  I’d love to tell you that from that moment on my life was completely different, but that wouldn't be the truth.  Overcoming my old thought patterns, giving God control, and finding my self-worth in Christ alone has been a hard battle that I’m still fighting.  There are still days when Satan whispers lies and my focus gets lost.  Sometimes I still wrestle with having a “bubble butt” (which I’m growing to love more and more btw) or not having perfectly shaped arms.  1 Timothy says “physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come.”  I still believe in physical training and its benefits but it’s not my idol anymore.

Passion from Pain

In August of 2014 a friend of my husband approached us about becoming coaches with a company called Beachbody.  I was hesitant at first because I didn't want to go back to idolizing fitness and my body.  After much prayer and consideration I signed-up.  Now I have found a place where I can help other people who are struggling in fitness and from that I can help them feel loved, motivated and most importantly help them to see that the shape of their body is not the source of joy.  Jesus Christ is.  He promises life to the fullest if we put our trust in Him, or like me, you take everything else off of the throne of your heart so He can have his rightful place.  There’s a scripture in Romans that says “He works all things for the good of those that love Him”.  I love that only God can take something sinful in my life and allow me to use my experience to help others.  Praise God!

Thursday, October 23, 2014

I can't breathe!

When I first decided I was going to get healthy I had no clue about fitness so I did what was logical to me-run.  I was never a fan of running.  In school, when we had to run the mile in PE I was miserable.  I have short legs and a bubble butt, neither are helpful when it comes to running.  Regardless, running seemed to be helpful for a lot of people so I laced up my only pair of sneakers and headed to a park near my house.  The loop around the park was about 3/4 of a mile.  I made it one time around and had to stop because I was gasping for air!  I was hot, sweaty and out of breath.  My body seemed to be crying out "Stop, I'm uncomfortable!".  I ran another lap, slower this time, then went home.  I kept running, but dreaded it every time.  I'm talking that deep down dread like when you're exhausted from a long days work but still have to go to the grocery store because there's nothing to eat at home kind of dread.  The worse part was I wasn't seeing any results.  I needed to do something different.  I discovered work out DVD's I could do at home (no, they weren't Beachbody, sorry).  I felt a little silly and awkward doing the moves at first but soon became a pro!  There wasn't a gym close by so at-home workouts were great for me.  That's where my transformation began-at home, by myself.  I believe if I can do it, anybody can do it.  I didn't have the support of a coach or a group of people I just kept showing up and doing the workout.  I did a lot of research on nutrition and learned my diet was more important than I initially realized.  I'm so excited for the opportunity to help others reach their fitness goals.  I wish I would have had a coach and a community of people to help encourage me.  I'm not an expert or some super-human.  I'm just an average woman with the same struggles as most women-hormones, time, family, cravings etc.  My journey is not over, I'm stil striving to be a better me, not just physically but emotionally, mentally and spiritually.  The first step is to start.  Will you take the first step?  If I can help in any way please let me know :)